Divorcing a Narcissist: What You and Your Divorce Attorney Need to Know
What is a Narcissist and How Does It Factor into My Divorce?
Narcissistic personality disorder, according to Dr. Ramani Durvasula’s Speaking of Psychology: Recognizing a Narcissist, is a “personality disorder that causes people to have a delusional sense of self-worth and lack of empathy.” Characteristics of narcissism can include but are not limited to an exaggerated sense of self-worth, a heightened sense of entitlement, a need to only associate with those also deemed special, a hypersensitivity to criticism, and an inability to empathize with others. In other words, a recipe for a toxic marriage. In any other type of divorce, although there may be emotions running high, you can expect your spouse to be reasonable to do their best to negotiate and settle with you in the courtroom. Your narcissist spouse is almost guaranteed not to be reasonable. Their goal is to win – which can mean a wide variety of things to them. In some especially vindictive cases, the narcissist spouse will not rest until they have everything. In understanding how to deal with the obstacles involved in divorcing a narcissist, you and your seasoned divorce attorney can strategize your way to a speedy divorce!
How do I Finalize the Divorce?
A divorce, especially one that your narcissist spouse was not expecting, will bring forth increasingly abusive behavior from your spouse. They could change the locks while you and your children are still living in the house. They could verbally harass you on a daily basis. They could alienate you from your social life by creating stories about you. They could disrupt the legal proceedings by making up lies about you. Ultimately, a narcissist spouse will do whatever is in their power to make the divorce difficult in a last-ditch effort to prevent you from divorcing. If they do want the divorce, they will make sure that it is on their own terms. One of the best ways you can best a narcissist spouse’s behavior is by not engaging in their behavior whatsoever. This means that you must cut off all contact with them except through your lawyer. Do not meet them privately for coffee or dinner even if they promise that they will compromise. Another way to combat a narcissist is to know the law. Some divorce attorneys will argue that the fastest way to get a divorce finalized is giving your narcissist spouse whatever they want. This could mean all of your savings and still having to pay off the debt you both accumulated together. Although you may want to be rid of your spouse once and for all, you should not have to ruin your financial stability to do so. Speak with your divorce attorney to understand what your worst-case scenario could be in court, and prepare for it. Do your own research on all aspects of the divorce and be prepared to meet your spouse’s outrageous claims with hard cold evidence. A judge, who sees narcissistic types on a regular basis, will see through your spouse and finalize the divorce equitably. No matter what happens during the divorce, keep in mind that your narcissist spouse has no control over you anymore – you are free. With the aid of a creatively strategic divorce attorney in Jacksonville, you can divorce your narcissistic spouse once and for all.